“Nice threads, man,” commented Donald when his buddy showed up one day in a snappy new suit. “Where’d you pick ’em up?” Richard beamed. “My wife got them for me. Pretty sharp, huh?” “I’ll say. What was the occasion?” “Got me,” admitted Richard with a cheerful shrug. “I came home from work early the other…

A man is reading his newspaper and says to his wife: “Michelle, look. Here is an article about how women use about twice as many words per day as men do.” The wife responds: “That’s because we have to tell you everything twice”

After being locked in an impenetrable escape room, a panicked Dr. Watson cries, “How are we to escape, Holmes?” Calmly, the sleuth produces a small knife and a lemon, which he carefully cuts into small pieces. He then sticks the pieces of lemon on the wall in the shape of a door, and with a…

Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap -tapping noise coming from the misty shadows. Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping…