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Day before I die….

Showing his friend around his home, Fred started to point out all of the collectibles he and his wife had acquired over their long years of marriage. “The day before I die, I’d like to sell every piece we’ve got just to see how much it’s all worth.” “But you couldn’t possibly know the day…

Workplace Humour….

A guy goes in for a job interview and sits down with the boss. The boss asks him, “What do you think is your worst quality?” The man says, “I’m probably too honest.” The boss says, “That’s not a bad thing, I think being honest is a good quality.” The man replies, “I don’t care…

Pearls of Wisdom-Voice of Experience

If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research There is a fine line between…

Making a Contribution…

A pig and a chicken were walking by a church where a gala charity event was taking place. Getting caught up in the spirit, the pig suggested to the chicken that they each make a contribution. “Great idea!” the chicken cried. “Let’s offer them ham and eggs!” “Not so fast,” said the pig. “For you,…

Writer’s Block

One morning at a small-town newspaper office, one of the editors was struggling to write a headline for the obituary of a woman who was noted for little besides a fondness for crossword puzzles. “What am I supposed to write?” the editor whined. “She liked puzzles?” Just then one of our copy editors piped up,…

An old guy working out….

An old guy was working out in the gym when he spotted an attractive young lady. He asked a nearby trainer, “What machine should I use to impress that lady over there?” The trainer looked him up and down and said, “I would try the ATM in the lobby.